One must consider the day of the week before embarking on a particular type of "blog post". We can't have any messages of dismay; anything to despairing or cynical would be a bit too much for Wednesday. Not too mention, I am still on some intensifying emotional high, that has left me in the most brilliant of moods for the last week or two.
I hate to say it... but when it's going bad, it is a most gruesome low; yet when things are going well, I get this insatiable thirst for laughter, friendship & kindred among many other things...but ultimately is a most sensational high!
Now, where might I be going with all this? You know something...I haven't a single clue. I woke up, ate leftovers, watched a movie, took a shower, and we went to the library...I suddenly, whilst standing amongst the books...had this driving urge to come home and write. I have no real direction, or anything in particular to say but most of you that know me, know when it comes to my writing, whether or not I know what I want say... tend to believe that when you get the urge...you have to just sit down and say it. "A writer always writes because it is all they want to do." I believe Science Fiction Author, Ray Bradbury said that. I expect that couldn't be more true for anyone who fancies themselves a writer.
I think I encourage people to write as much as I do because of my simple belief that if it is in your head, and it flows forth from your fingers; no matter how irrelevant it may sound to you there is a reason the words you chose, came to mind, and therefore have a right to be in the world. Whether it be for your peace of mind, or for a million others who may run into it. I literally believe that there are no coincidences when it comes to writing. I suppose my theories are akin to what some might consider automatic writing. If you think about it, it is actually quite similar; I wouldn't necessarily say it is trance-like...However, when you sit down and begin to type or write with nothing particularly in mind, you have to agree that your mind is not exactly in a conscious state-you are essentially rambling until it all begins to make sense.
While that particular brand of sophistication and enlightenment may not be found on this blog page today, I must admit rather freely that I feel somewhat accomplished and have a sense of well-being. I suddenly know that I was able to coax myself, once again, into a more sound state of satisfaction.
I suppose that will be a never ending battle I will face with chronic depression, and chronic refusal to take pills to make myself well. I prefer to talk to my depression and persistent pain associated with my Parkinson's. The roller coaster of emotion, up and downs that have a tendency to spiral out of control if I don't get them in check. I've said it once, I will say it a thousand times: "Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem." Point of that? To affirm why exactly, I need to always keep myself in check.
I refuse to follow in those foot-steps...and I scare myself when I get that low. My mind starts drifting and yes, again. I scare myself. Although I once read that if it is something you are afraid of, then...it isn't something you ever really need to worry about because subconsciously you know where you stand on the subject/issue.
I happen to chose to believe that...it makes perfect sense.
Moving on, have a happy and fulfilling Wednesday everyone!
Live Spherically!
